Saying Goodbye

I lost Sadie today,
March 9th,
just after noon. 

I felt her life leave me…
sucked right out of my chest. 

Creating what I can only
understand
as an enormous hole,
edges torn where we
ripped apart. 

When the doctor said
“she’s passed,” I
did not believe her. 

“She’s here,” I thought.
“She’s right in front of me.”

She was still Sadie as we
lifted her onto her stretcher.
She was still Sadie as we
folded the quilted blanket over her.
She was still Sadie as we
carried her to the doctor’s car.

But when I turned away,
she was gone.
And the wind from her passing
rushed through me.